[ ah. well. it sure looks like a crime scene in here. yin yu knows it isn't one, as he steps through the portal later in the evening. now that he's had a little time to vent his own feelings, he's back to emotional shutdown mode, and it is in that that he goes to seek out his friend.
it takes a while for him to find guy, but his observation skills rarely fail him, so. yin yu makes his way the stairs and finds the lounge room, entering almost soundlessly as he pulls the stupid unwieldy wings back behind him. normally, he's near presenceless, but, lately, he seems to be a bit more noticeable...not that he's trying to hide anyway.
he knocks his knuckles against the side of the bar, twice. ] ...Guy.
He's seated on the ground, arms against his knees and a tumblr in his hand. Those dusty blond ears are still lying back against his hair as he stares into his cup, a simmering anger more visible coupled with a dark exhaustion that he cares less to hide now that alcohol has stirred his mind.
Blue eyes will flick up, just to acknowledge the voice, to see Yin Yu's unwavering expression. Then they flick right back to his glass.]
Figured you'd find me eventually.
[It's a dry response. But the bitterness is palatable.]
[ he huffs, a quiet noise, and reaches to push his mask back up on the top of his head. he's been wearing it a little less lately, so it's not so unusual to see his face: he still just looks tired, too. ]
Given my experience... people can't hide from me for very long.
[ he's very, very good at finding people who do.
yin yu eventually comes to sit in one of the barstools, letting the wings on his back fall over the back of the chair with a soft rustle. ] What are you drinking?
[That's. Fine. Haha. The bottle is next to him, so it's not like he can't check right now. But what if he just.
Swigs his entire glass back into his mouth instead. That's an easier decision. The bite stings. It's a distraction from how badly he wants to throw the glass in his hand at the wall.]
Wasn't impressed with what we had available on the shelves. Momentary vice, I guess.
Everyone is allowed their vices. [ take it from someone who lives in ghost vegas. yin yu sits up across the bar to look properly down at guy, and then stretches to reach over and pluck up the bottle by the top. he's not really sure what it is, either, honestly, but. he swings out of his seat and fetches a glass, to pour himself a two fingers of whatever it is, too.
he's quiet as he goes through the motions of doing so, pouring the drink, capping the bottle, and setting it back down. for the moment he stays here, at the bar itself, before he comes around to the other side and sits. not too close to guy, and technically, facing the other wall, but visible nonetheless.
yin yu sits the bottle down on his other side, too. ] ...Will you talk to me?
[He won't stop the other servant from taking the bottle, nor will he move when Yin Yu circles around to sit across from him.
It's the question that earns another reaction, another flick of his eyes.]
Depends what we're talking about. [He drags one hand through his hair, leaning his weight against his arm as he taps the now-empty glass against one leg with his free hand.] I've heard more than enough today.
Good to know your guesses were correct after all, though. [Good is the wrong word by far but right now, he doesn't seem to care to correct himself.] You really are more observant than we give you credit for.
It has always been my job, to be observant without others noticing. Hua Chengzhu asks would expect nothing less of a full report for any job that I do.
... There were just too many factors that I don't think I could have even dreamed of.
[ the way the roles combined, the different uses of powers - this game was quite loaded against the, especially for yin yu, who came from a game with neither of those things, short of their mastermind.
he turns his wrist, letting the liquid swirl in the glass. ] ...I knew far less than I should have, it seems.
yin yu takes a sip of his drink. it burns, a little, but it's familiar, too.
(It was a sweet, bubbly drink called soda, mixed with... whiskey, I believe. You must try it! It was much tastier than I had expected.) ]
No... it wasn't. [ he says, to the drink in his hand, sounding a little wistful, staring down. it's just dredges up worse memories; the island, the blur of his memories, the way black shadows--wen ning croaked his hellos after the prenup. ] In the end, some are more of victims than others. So few of the people among us in the place we have been have had blood on their hands.
Blood on your hands or not, if you take a life, for whatever reason, you need to take ownership and live with that, or else that life you took is worth nothing.
[That bitter tone only strengthens as his words quietly start to tumble out, spurred by twenty-five days of nothing but sour frustrations and denials.]
They can explain all they want, but falling prostrate and saying how hard they've had it doesn't solve anything. It doesn't change that many people died in their place for things they chose to do, and that we maybe we don't want a damn apology or taling their life in revenge, when apologies don't change what they could have easily taken from everyone and killing them gives them nothing but a pithy way out.
Own up to your damn burdens and live. Don't sit there and imply that all of our lives were just fodder because you couldn't find a better way. Keep doing something about it.
What's so hard to understand about that?
[This is exactly why he is not at the store right now, because this kind of talk would probably get him knifed by Shinobu.
[ everything guy's saying is, of course, true. yin yu doesn't really disagree with him. the "my life is hard" talk got quite repetitive, six times in a row. but he knows... he doesn't know everyone in that group, but there are a few of them who he knows would have done everything they can to try to avoid it, or at least try to solve it. who knows why it took this long. can they do anything in time, in this godforsaken place?
he tilts his head back against the edge of the bar and listens, thoughtfully tapping his fingertips against his glass. he's biased, for at least one member of that group, but... ]
...I can understand wanting to admit to guilt, but I don't believe that absolve you of it, either. Even Flayn. [ yin yu says, quietly. ] ...But I don't think that she was absolving herself of anything, either.
[ he could see it in her face, on that screen, on saturday. flayn wanted to die. she wanted to die, today, too, and ahving someone get scapegoated for something she participated in - now more than once must have been killing her.
but she has to live, to get the rest of them back. it will never cure the guilt - he knows that by experience - but she has to live. ]
Ultimately, we don't know what they're doing, beyond what we can see on our screens. As things are finally seeming to draw to a close, those of the living who caused this suffering have a chance to continue doing something, because ultimately... is our enemy each other, or is it the thing that has caused all of this in the first place?
I am not saying there is no reason to be angry. [ as he glances down at his glass. ] But rather, that this fight isn't over yet. And you will be able to speak these words to them, yourself, when it is.
Not the point. [Yin Yu is being very kind and logical about all this, but that just stirs at him in a say that is viscerally uncomfortable right this moment, as partially inebriated as he is.]
I know what the goal is, Yin Yu. I know, I know it's not that simple. I've spent the better part of a month telling myself it's not that simple. I know.
But I'm not crammed back here to think about what I know. For once, I just -- I can't think it through logically right now, alright? Later. Later, when I have to go back to that stone-floored hell and gather up everyone and keep pretending I didn't get my head bashed through for absolutely nothing, because that's just what I have to do.
[...
...
His exhales are ragged as his tail tucks against his legs, the only evidence that he's aware of how loud he's getting. He takes a second, just to pull his voice back down.]
...I'm going to blow up on someone otherwise. Like Zenitsu. Minako. Shinobu.
Sorry. I know what's you're trying to do. It's not unwanted. But just leave logic out of this for a minute.
[ he's quiet, after that, letting guy get everything out. his anger, his emotions, the volume -- he doesn't react. he just listens, quietly, a sounding board as ever.
and then he nods. ] ...Then, let's drink. [ yin yu lifts his own glass, too, in guy's direction. ] And tell me something you hate about this place.
[ with a huff, he looks at his glass. ] I hate the terrible clothing they shoved us in, when we first arrived on that monstrosity of a 'bus'.
He looks sullen for a moment. But only a moment. Those ears on his head cock forward just a little.
Quietly, he'll gesture for the bottle. His glass is empty, man, let him participate if we're gonna do this.]
Lousy excuse for a joke, right?
Here I had a theory running for that bus the whole time and it turned out to be complete nonsense. Junpei could have stopped me at any time, but I think he likes pulling my damn leg.
the comment makes him smile, a little, a bit amused as he lolls his head to look over at guy. ] He seems the type. What was your theory, if you don’t mind me asking?
[He is, at least, being modest with his portion. He is not drinking to get drunk, he is drinking to numb his brain and stop caring for half a minute.]
I used that board on the counter to speak with it. From what I'd gathered, whatever the "bus" was, whether it was a thing or a person or just part of the remnants we brought along - it had done this before. We talked about reincarnation, and that it had many forms, and that it would have likely been something different had our group been different.
For a while, I got stuck on that idea - that this place might be an idea of rebirth of ideas and memories off our experiences, and that our directors might have been the same as the bus.
[Obviously, that's not what happened. But -]
It's mostly been debunked. But I think that that jade figure, the masked one we still don't know?
yin yu does not laugh, because he's nice, and also because it seems like a fair enough assessment.... they know it's completely wrong now, but it's not terrible. ]
I can't say that it sounds that far-fetched, but, I also know very little about whatever brought us here. [ buses... are lost on him. he considers his theory. ] Have you told young master Junpei that theory as well?
Akira thought that I was working with the one wearing the mask. [ yin yu adds, after a moment. he sounds very amused, and he reaches into his pockets and pulls out a simple jade token on a red string. it bears the characters "下弦月使". ] ... Because I had this on me.
It's a symbol that represents my position. I use it to gain passage on behalf of my lord every so often.
[ in retrospect, it is very silly. ] Of course, I do not have any involvement, so I'd say your theory is a bit more sound than his.
Akira's pretty good at taking things a couple steps too far. He's the one who saw I was missing my choker and assumed someone had possibly taken it during a fight or something. He's quick, but that leads him down some overthought routes sometimes.
[Taking a swig.]
Like blaming me for a murder, and then saying he wanted to die in my place. Stupid stuff like that.
Anyway. Yeah, Junpei knows. All he would tell me is that they know who the person in the mask is. Otherwise, he just was something to throw ideas at. Entertaining, but not exactly helpful.
I think you're correct. [ ahhh... depressing. he'd grown pretty fond of akira, towards the end of his stay. maybe there's a reason.
..he makes a soft noise, this time, the amusement a bit darker. ] ...Perhaps that's something to add to the list. I quite hate how this place has us all questioning everything we know without finding many answers.
[ ....the drink's still strong on the way down, but the burn's a little reliving. ]
Agreed. Once bitten, twice shy, or however that saying goes. But I wonder how many accidents we could have avoided if we all weren't second guessing ourselves from experience.
[He sighs, his next statement wry.]
For being a bunch of people who used to be stuck in places that required solving murders, we're all pretty damn bad at solving murders.
[ that does make yin yu laugh, this time, the noise startled out of him. ]
...We certainly are. [ gods above. cheers to that! he lifts his drink to it. ] I think I shall quite like going back to dealing with ghosts, when all of this is said and done.
And that's apparently embarrassing because guy immediately like. Shoves his fluffy wagging tail out of the way with one hand and lifts his glass with the other]
It all sounds bleak to me, putting it like that. You've been through far more of life than I have, so I'll try not to say something out of turn. But being surrounded by nothing but the dead sounds like a miserable place to spend eternity.
[Yknow. Like hell costco, but infinite and full of even more ghosts.]
[ yin yu absolutely notices that, but he will say nothing, because again, he is a nice person. his mouth twitches, though, up into a smile, even as he talks through his impression of ghost city. ]
...Believe it or not, it's extremely lively. It's not just ghosts - there are demons, too, and it's as crowded as crowded can be. Think of the largest city you possibly can in your homeland, and fill it with creatures of all sorts, most of whom are extremely rowdy. Many of the businesses cater to the ... ah, less proper side of life and death alike, too. There's never a dull moment, and it is a place that constantly keeps me busy.
[ it's actually almost the opposite of the campsco. ] It took some getting used to when I first arrived-- [ because by gods he was depressed!!! boy howdy. he looks down into his glass, the smile remaining for a moment longer, a bit far away. ] but I've come to enjoy many parts of it. I would say it's more strange than miserable.
So more like a hub of some sort...? Or is it meant to be more permanent affairs?
[That's fascinating, but weird? You just stop existing when you die, as far as he's concerned. Life is your only shot. No exceptions. So to think of the dead just continuing life in some sort of Keterburg-esque super city is kind of out there...]
I don't know if I could wrap my mind around it enough, honestly. Death is more or less accepted as a finality on Auldrant.
[and he and death AREN'T FRIENDS WHATSOEVER which makes their current situation all sorts of awkward]
Mm. It's a bit of both. Some will be able to move on peacefully and reincarnate. Others will not - some residents of the city have been there as long as I, or nearly longer. Hua Chengzhu himself is by all technicalities, dead, but he's lived for over eight hundred years.
...In my world, it is more so common to see life and death as a cycle. When you pass, you reincarnate, and that cycle continues. Only those who achieve immortality through godhood or cultivation continue to live on as the same. [ yin yu takes a sip of his drink, thoughtfully. ] It can be final, but such finality it something best to be avoided.
[ because that means your soul got shattered, more or less. not fun! ]
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it takes a while for him to find guy, but his observation skills rarely fail him, so. yin yu makes his way the stairs and finds the lounge room, entering almost soundlessly as he pulls the stupid unwieldy wings back behind him. normally, he's near presenceless, but, lately, he seems to be a bit more noticeable...not that he's trying to hide anyway.
he knocks his knuckles against the side of the bar, twice. ] ...Guy.
[ and then looks over. ]
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He's seated on the ground, arms against his knees and a tumblr in his hand. Those dusty blond ears are still lying back against his hair as he stares into his cup, a simmering anger more visible coupled with a dark exhaustion that he cares less to hide now that alcohol has stirred his mind.
Blue eyes will flick up, just to acknowledge the voice, to see Yin Yu's unwavering expression. Then they flick right back to his glass.]
Figured you'd find me eventually.
[It's a dry response. But the bitterness is palatable.]
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Given my experience... people can't hide from me for very long.
[ he's very, very good at finding people who do.
yin yu eventually comes to sit in one of the barstools, letting the wings on his back fall over the back of the chair with a soft rustle. ] What are you drinking?
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Can't say I checked.
[That's. Fine. Haha. The bottle is next to him, so it's not like he can't check right now. But what if he just.
Swigs his entire glass back into his mouth instead. That's an easier decision. The bite stings. It's a distraction from how badly he wants to throw the glass in his hand at the wall.]
Wasn't impressed with what we had available on the shelves. Momentary vice, I guess.
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he's quiet as he goes through the motions of doing so, pouring the drink, capping the bottle, and setting it back down. for the moment he stays here, at the bar itself, before he comes around to the other side and sits. not too close to guy, and technically, facing the other wall, but visible nonetheless.
yin yu sits the bottle down on his other side, too. ] ...Will you talk to me?
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It's the question that earns another reaction, another flick of his eyes.]
Depends what we're talking about. [He drags one hand through his hair, leaning his weight against his arm as he taps the now-empty glass against one leg with his free hand.] I've heard more than enough today.
Good to know your guesses were correct after all, though. [Good is the wrong word by far but right now, he doesn't seem to care to correct himself.] You really are more observant than we give you credit for.
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... There were just too many factors that I don't think I could have even dreamed of.
[ the way the roles combined, the different uses of powers - this game was quite loaded against the, especially for yin yu, who came from a game with neither of those things, short of their mastermind.
he turns his wrist, letting the liquid swirl in the glass. ] ...I knew far less than I should have, it seems.
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It wasn't your fault it took eighteen bodies of mostly innocent people to get actual answers.
[There's a scoff as his head twists to face the floor with his hand running from his hair to his eyes, his voice muffling.]
"Trying to protect us", my ass.
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yin yu takes a sip of his drink. it burns, a little, but it's familiar, too.
(It was a sweet, bubbly drink called soda, mixed with... whiskey, I believe. You must try it! It was much tastier than I had expected.) ]
No... it wasn't. [ he says, to the drink in his hand, sounding a little wistful, staring down. it's just dredges up worse memories; the island, the blur of his memories, the way black shadows--wen ning croaked his hellos after the prenup. ] In the end, some are more of victims than others. So few of the people among us in the place we have been have had blood on their hands.
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Blood on your hands or not, if you take a life, for whatever reason, you need to take ownership and live with that, or else that life you took is worth nothing.
[That bitter tone only strengthens as his words quietly start to tumble out, spurred by twenty-five days of nothing but sour frustrations and denials.]
They can explain all they want, but falling prostrate and saying how hard they've had it doesn't solve anything. It doesn't change that many people died in their place for things they chose to do, and that we maybe we don't want a damn apology or taling their life in revenge, when apologies don't change what they could have easily taken from everyone and killing them gives them nothing but a pithy way out.
Own up to your damn burdens and live. Don't sit there and imply that all of our lives were just fodder because you couldn't find a better way. Keep doing something about it.
What's so hard to understand about that?
[This is exactly why he is not at the store right now, because this kind of talk would probably get him knifed by Shinobu.
But fuck Shinobu right now.]
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he tilts his head back against the edge of the bar and listens, thoughtfully tapping his fingertips against his glass. he's biased, for at least one member of that group, but... ]
...I can understand wanting to admit to guilt, but I don't believe that absolve you of it, either. Even Flayn. [ yin yu says, quietly. ] ...But I don't think that she was absolving herself of anything, either.
[ he could see it in her face, on that screen, on saturday. flayn wanted to die. she wanted to die, today, too, and ahving someone get scapegoated for something she participated in - now more than once must have been killing her.
but she has to live, to get the rest of them back. it will never cure the guilt - he knows that by experience - but she has to live. ]
Ultimately, we don't know what they're doing, beyond what we can see on our screens. As things are finally seeming to draw to a close, those of the living who caused this suffering have a chance to continue doing something, because ultimately... is our enemy each other, or is it the thing that has caused all of this in the first place?
I am not saying there is no reason to be angry. [ as he glances down at his glass. ] But rather, that this fight isn't over yet. And you will be able to speak these words to them, yourself, when it is.
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I know what the goal is, Yin Yu. I know, I know it's not that simple. I've spent the better part of a month telling myself it's not that simple. I know.
But I'm not crammed back here to think about what I know. For once, I just -- I can't think it through logically right now, alright? Later. Later, when I have to go back to that stone-floored hell and gather up everyone and keep pretending I didn't get my head bashed through for absolutely nothing, because that's just what I have to do.
[...
...
His exhales are ragged as his tail tucks against his legs, the only evidence that he's aware of how loud he's getting. He takes a second, just to pull his voice back down.]
...I'm going to blow up on someone otherwise. Like Zenitsu. Minako. Shinobu.
Sorry. I know what's you're trying to do. It's not unwanted. But just leave logic out of this for a minute.
[Please.]
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and then he nods. ] ...Then, let's drink. [ yin yu lifts his own glass, too, in guy's direction. ] And tell me something you hate about this place.
[ with a huff, he looks at his glass. ] I hate the terrible clothing they shoved us in, when we first arrived on that monstrosity of a 'bus'.
[ and takes a sip. ]
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He looks sullen for a moment. But only a moment. Those ears on his head cock forward just a little.
Quietly, he'll gesture for the bottle. His glass is empty, man, let him participate if we're gonna do this.]
Lousy excuse for a joke, right?
Here I had a theory running for that bus the whole time and it turned out to be complete nonsense. Junpei could have stopped me at any time, but I think he likes pulling my damn leg.
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the comment makes him smile, a little, a bit amused as he lolls his head to look over at guy. ] He seems the type. What was your theory, if you don’t mind me asking?
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I used that board on the counter to speak with it. From what I'd gathered, whatever the "bus" was, whether it was a thing or a person or just part of the remnants we brought along - it had done this before. We talked about reincarnation, and that it had many forms, and that it would have likely been something different had our group been different.
For a while, I got stuck on that idea - that this place might be an idea of rebirth of ideas and memories off our experiences, and that our directors might have been the same as the bus.
[Obviously, that's not what happened. But -]
It's mostly been debunked. But I think that that jade figure, the masked one we still don't know?
I think that's our "bus".
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yin yu does not laugh, because he's nice, and also because it seems like a fair enough assessment.... they know it's completely wrong now, but it's not terrible. ]
I can't say that it sounds that far-fetched, but, I also know very little about whatever brought us here. [ buses... are lost on him. he considers his theory. ] Have you told young master Junpei that theory as well?
Akira thought that I was working with the one wearing the mask. [ yin yu adds, after a moment. he sounds very amused, and he reaches into his pockets and pulls out a simple jade token on a red string. it bears the characters "下弦月使". ] ... Because I had this on me.
It's a symbol that represents my position. I use it to gain passage on behalf of my lord every so often.
[ in retrospect, it is very silly. ] Of course, I do not have any involvement, so I'd say your theory is a bit more sound than his.
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[Taking a swig.]
Like blaming me for a murder, and then saying he wanted to die in my place. Stupid stuff like that.
Anyway. Yeah, Junpei knows. All he would tell me is that they know who the person in the mask is. Otherwise, he just was something to throw ideas at. Entertaining, but not exactly helpful.
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..he makes a soft noise, this time, the amusement a bit darker. ] ...Perhaps that's something to add to the list. I quite hate how this place has us all questioning everything we know without finding many answers.
[ ....the drink's still strong on the way down, but the burn's a little reliving. ]
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[He sighs, his next statement wry.]
For being a bunch of people who used to be stuck in places that required solving murders, we're all pretty damn bad at solving murders.
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...We certainly are. [ gods above. cheers to that! he lifts his drink to it. ] I think I shall quite like going back to dealing with ghosts, when all of this is said and done.
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And that's apparently embarrassing because guy immediately like. Shoves his fluffy wagging tail out of the way with one hand and lifts his glass with the other]
It all sounds bleak to me, putting it like that. You've been through far more of life than I have, so I'll try not to say something out of turn. But being surrounded by nothing but the dead sounds like a miserable place to spend eternity.
[Yknow. Like hell costco, but infinite and full of even more ghosts.]
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...Believe it or not, it's extremely lively. It's not just ghosts - there are demons, too, and it's as crowded as crowded can be. Think of the largest city you possibly can in your homeland, and fill it with creatures of all sorts, most of whom are extremely rowdy. Many of the businesses cater to the ... ah, less proper side of life and death alike, too. There's never a dull moment, and it is a place that constantly keeps me busy.
[ it's actually almost the opposite of the campsco. ] It took some getting used to when I first arrived-- [ because by gods he was depressed!!! boy howdy. he looks down into his glass, the smile remaining for a moment longer, a bit far away. ] but I've come to enjoy many parts of it. I would say it's more strange than miserable.
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[That's fascinating, but weird? You just stop existing when you die, as far as he's concerned. Life is your only shot. No exceptions. So to think of the dead just continuing life in some sort of Keterburg-esque super city is kind of out there...]
I don't know if I could wrap my mind around it enough, honestly. Death is more or less accepted as a finality on Auldrant.
[and he and death AREN'T FRIENDS WHATSOEVER which makes their current situation all sorts of awkward]
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...In my world, it is more so common to see life and death as a cycle. When you pass, you reincarnate, and that cycle continues. Only those who achieve immortality through godhood or cultivation continue to live on as the same. [ yin yu takes a sip of his drink, thoughtfully. ] It can be final, but such finality it something best to be avoided.
[ because that means your soul got shattered, more or less. not fun! ]
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